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Posts tagged with "Surgery"

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Badass Surgeon Performs Whipple While in Tuxedo

AUSTIN, TX – The bar for badassery has been raised a notch, so surgeons take note: veteran general surgeon Bob Cooper has just completed a successful 8-hour Whipple (or pancreaticoduodenectomy) while wearing a tuxedo. “First of all, and most importantly, the patient is doing well and is expected to make a good...
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Northeast Hospital the First to Institute Eyebrow Covers FEATURED

Northeast Hospital the First to Institute Eyebrow Covers

August 14th, 201904 A recent change in the rules governing the role of hair coverage has caused a frenzy among all surgical staff. Whereas before, a bouffant cap and a mask were sufficient, now a plethora of mandates have expanded the wardrobe of OR staff. Two hats for thick, curly hair. Finer filtration hats for those with thin hair. Mustaches require...
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Struggling Hospital Converts Idle Operating Rooms Into Escape Rooms on Weekend

SPRINGFIELD, NJ—One of the most popular new forms of entertainment may be coming to a hospital near you. In an effort to make more money, struggling hospitals are converting their idle operating rooms into escape rooms on the weekend. “It makes perfect sense,” said an excited Richard Branchman, CEO of Springfield...
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Scooter Harvest Ride for Organ Donation

NASHVILLE, TN–The United Network for Organ Sharing announced today plans to unroll 500 dockless electric scooters for ride sharing purposes in major metropolitan cities that have robust transplant programs. This new brand, Harvest Ride, will have one noticeable difference compared to markets leaders such as Bird and Lime: these...
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DIY Appendectomy Kit Now Available

With surgeons’ schedules increasingly filled, a DIY appendectomy kit has been created to save both patients’ and doctors’ time. “Appendectomies are really easy,” said general surgeon and the kit’s inventor, Dr. Gregory Smith. “I’m wasting my day doing something any child with steady hands...
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Manhattan Clam Chowder Mistaken For Bloody Emesis FEATURED

Manhattan Clam Chowder Mistaken For Bloody Emesis

July 18th, 201902 New York, NY- In a case of understandable confusion, a bowl of uneaten Manhattan Clam Chowder was mistaken for bloody emesis at Columbia University Hospital today.  “I saw the bowl of bloody puke and immediately thought the worst” General Surgery intern Toomani Hashtagues walked into the room of an upper GI bleeder and...
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Surgical Residency disassembled after Intern fills out ACGME survey FEATURED

Surgical Residency disassembled after Intern fills out ACGME survey

June 15th, 201902 On Monday, 40 surgical residents from the prestigious Hospital for Ultimate Surgery found themselves without a job due to their fellow intern’s ACGME survey. Every year, the academic head of medical education, ACGME, conducts a survey of every resident to ensure resident well-being and training. It takes anything less than...
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Surgery on a Grape: Behind the Drapes

By now, everyone has seen the videos of the da Vinci robotic surgery system being used to skin a grape, and the memes that have gone along with it. Here is what was left on the cutting room floor, behind the drapes: – Wheeling in the da Vinci robot and all its accoutrements – Yelling at the first assistant for docking the...
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Da Vinci Code to Honoring Surgery Clerkship

Morgantown, WV – Third year medical student, well-known gunner, and surgery aspirant Ian DeBakey has gone where no medical student has gone before. While many students purchase suture supplies and trauma shears for their surgical clerkship, Ian DeBakey decided to do a little more. In an unprecedented move, DeBakey visited his local...
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FEATURED

Da Vinci Code to Honoring Surgery Clerkship

Morgantown, WV – Third year medical student, well-known gunner, and surgery aspirant Ian DeBakey has gone where no medical student has gone before. While many students purchase suture supplies and trauma shears for their surgical clerkship, Ian DeBakey decided to do a little more. In an unprecedented move, DeBakey visited his local...
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